Kotick says Activision is heading in “bold, new direction” with Call of Duty 9
SANTA MONICA, CALIFORNIA – Activision-Blizzard CEO Robert “Bobby” Kotick gathered members of the gaming media today to announce the first concrete details of the company’s much-anticipated shooter title, Call of Duty 9. After demonstrating over 20 minutes of gameplay in which players fired handguns, achieved killstreaks, and threw grenades, Kotick addressed the crowd.
“Call of Duty 9, which represents the ninth entry into the franchise, will follow in the footsteps of its predecessors by moving in a bold, new direction,” he said. “Fans of the series should know that this isn’t their grandfather’s Call of Duty. This one has a nine after it.”
With a wave of his large, generous hands, Kotick commanded nearly two dozen women in military camouflage bikinis to distribute early review copies of Call of Duty 9 to every journalist in attendance. After several rounds of applause and a steak dinner, the the floor opened for follow-up questions.
“We all expect Call of Duty 9 to win Game of the Year,” said Kotaku writer Luke Plunkett between bites of filet mignon, “but what features should gamers be most excited about? Is it the non-stop heart-pounding pacing of COD’s single player campaign, or the revolutionary online matchmaking system that now features less latency than ever before?”
“Why not both?” replied Sophie Orlando, Senior Public Relations Manager for Activision Europe. “We believe every gamer over the age of 17, as required by the ESRB, should anticipate Call of Duty 9 to have all the thrills of the previous eight titles. Only this time, the action is even hotter, with a new number and a number of new ways to top the leaderboards.”
When gently pressed for elaboration on the new facet of leaderboard progression, Orlando remarked, “Through Call of Duty Elite Access Premium, players will be able to spend all-new Credits of Duty to increase statistics such as KDR, hours played, or to unlock Premium features like killstreaks, jumping, and cooperative play.”
Although the audience’s demeanor grew slightly less excited following Orlando’s comment, the mood lifted when she announced all members of the gaming press would receive free subscriptions to Call of Duty Elite Access Premium.